Top 100 Funny Valentine’s Day Messages

Anyone who has celebrated valentines with that special someone will tell you it is one of the most romantic times to ever come around especially with the feeling of love that spreads throughout. Seeing other people celebrating the same day is common but what if you added a little twist to your valentine surprise for that special someone.

Happy Valentine's Day

Sending a funny valentines messages is rarely unheard of, that is why doing it might be a really good idea, do what they never thought you’d do. Surprise your special someone with a funny message and see the day grow with laughter as light humor prevails. Don’t be shy about it, send one of these only if your loved one has the same sense of humor you do.

Best Funny Valentine’s Day Messages

There’s one thing I know, money can’t buy love, but it can buy lots of love ?. I’ll make lots of money and get lots of love from you. Happy Valentine’s Day my love.
I’ve been thinking so hard to tell you how much I’ve loved you, I wish I was there when they gave birth to you; I’ll just marry you straight away. Happy Valentine’s Day love.
Before I met you, I was living my life like nothing else matters to me than friends, but now I’m living like nothing else matters than you. I’ve neglected my friends. Happy Valentine’s Day cutie.

They say love is blind, but to me it is not, your love actually opened my eye to all of your faults and yet I still love you. ? . Happy Valentine’s Day my love. .
You don’t stole my heart, you just hacked my brain. I even forgot my name when I am with you. Happy valentine day, my sweet baby.
Love is termite and I am hollow inside in glow of your love. Wishing you a happy valentine day.

Money can not buy love but it can buy lots of love

From the moment I saw you I knew I would be doing this, happy Valentine’s Day my frog, I finally turned you into a prince. I love you!
You are the sun that lights up my days, but also gives me sunburns. Love you to the sun’s heat and back, Happy Valentine’s Day!

I am that secret of your life which you can never hide. But you play with my heart I know well. Happy valentine day.
Happy Valentine’s Day my love, I have resisted all things in my life, but it seems you’re irresistible, because you’re my only temptation in every way. Let’s enjoy the day.
They say life is a race, run at your own pace, but I couldn’t even walk without you in this race. You’ve become my legs and my everything. Happy Valentine’s Day my love.
I have never seen any place where a bike stands on its own? Because it is two-tired. I will be too tired to live my life without you. Happy Valentine’s Day my life. Let’s enjoy.
You always live in my heart and spread all over in my blood. I became a diabetic patient due to your over weight. Happy Valentine day, my fatty.
Love like this was carefully crafted in Valens’s den, never heard of it; maybe I’ll take you there today. Happy Valentine’s Day!
Never forget how we looked like now, some day we will be old and wrinkly, but the best part about it is we will be old and wrinkly together. Happy Valentine’s my love!
Love is blind so true. How mad I am how can I fall in love with you. Never mind! Happy valentine.
Words are not enough to explain my love for you. May be my stupid face. Wishing you a wonderful valentine day.

they say love is blind but to me it is not

Happy Valentine’s Day my dear love, I’m glad you could finally love me, now I can die in peace and I hope we die together ?. But let’s enjoy today first.
There are few things that I can’t wait to rip their clothes off when I get married, one is you and two is you. ? I love you so much darling. Happy Valentine’s Day.
You are the sweet topping of my ice-cream. I wish this ice-cream never melts. Have a wonderful valentine day.

Could life journey be complete without you, will it mean anything without you, I guess it’ll mean something if someone more prettier comes to me.? but for now there’s none. Happy Valentine’s Day my love.
Without you I’m just like a gentle cat mewing around, but with you in my life, I always transform to a tiger in a fanciful color, tearing every little animal. Happy Valentine’s Day my love.
I always try to put my best foot forward to resolve all the issues prevailing between us. But all go in vain. Because you are so silly and dumb. Happy valentine day, anyways.

Happy Valentines Day. Be my valentine

I am your electric oven you have the power to control me. Wishing you a wonderful valentine day, my sweet and sour love.
Your farts are the best parts of you, because I know we will be together forever, except for the days we’ve had beans, then, I want to kick you out. Happy Valentine’s Day dear!
Roses are red and so are you, when you blush next to me I feel so good. Happy Valentine’s Day my sweetheart, you are the best part of any day!
Do not confess until and unless you are getting married. Happy valentine day. A little point for the lovers.
You are an essential nutrient of my body. Without you I would suffer in osteoporosis. Happy valentine day, my love of life.
Today I want to know if you’ll end up marrying me. Let’s flip a coin, if it’s the head, then I’m yours, if it’s tail then you’re mine ? it’s a fair deal. Happy Valentine’s Day.
Happy valentine’s day my love and my everything, I want you to know that life is short, so let’s love each other forever, even if it’s difficult. Enjoy this day with me.
I’m so happy to be the love of your life, you’re the second creature to fall in complete love with me, the first were the mosquitos not even my mom. ?. Happy Valentine’s Day dear.

Lilies are white and Brinjals are purple, with time my love for you is getting double. Have a fabulous valentine day.
I see your face in every cow. Please lose some pounds for me. Happy valentine day.
You are my favorite dish that I love to eat daily. Wishing you the most romantic day. Happy valentine day.
My whole world surrounds you. Even I forget the zoo, when I am with you. Wish you a very happy valentine day, sweetheart.

Funny Valentines Day love cards

Happy Valentine’s Day the only beautiful woman I’ve had in my life, all the rest are extremely ugly woman in man skin ?. I’m glad you’re better than them all.
Today we’re far apart I hope you’ll enjoy your valentine’s day away from me. But not with another man or else. You don’t want to know what I’ll do. ?. Happy Valentine’s Day my love.
Happy Valentine’s Day my love. Do not follow the masses who said you shouldn’t marry a man like me, they all want to marry me secretly, but I refused them. Stick with me my love.
My dear and my friend, you are the woman I think of everyday and the reason, I really don’t know, but I guess it’s love. I love you forever. Happy Valentine’s Day.
My day is incomplete without you. I love you my candy. Happy valentine day.
I love you as I love to drink soft drinks. Happy Valentine day.
You are the blanket of my winter with whom I cannot sleep. Wishing you the love day.
If you break my heart, I will break your all bones. So never dare to cheat me. I love you a lot. I wish you the best valentine day.
For every 2 hours I spend away from you, I want to complement it with 5 hours. So we could talk through the night. Hehehehehehe. I hope it’s only talk though. Happy Valentine’s Day my love.
In this world, there are about 4 billion women and 3 billion men. Among all of them, I chose to be with you, even though I’m ugly. You’re a lucky woman. ?. Happy Valentine’s Day.
Before I met you, I’m full of weight, but now I have shed lots of weight. You’re the best weight management therapy. ?. Now let’s go inside to lose more weight. Happy Valentine’s Day.
You are my true love, my love of life, to whom I am living and you are always in the radiance of my sight. Is that me? Not of course! My BMW! Now I am going to spend my valentine day with her.
Someday the best part of our day will be changing diapers together, but that won’t matter for I know our children will have your beautiful eyes. Happy Valentine’s my love!
I love you more than my washroom slipper. Happy valentine day.
Happy Valentine’s Day my lovely girlfriend, I really want you to marry me, but they said marriage makes people fall out of love. Let’s not marry then, but I’m still yours. ? enjoy this day.
I may run out of words to say, but I’d never run out of energy to always get you what you want. Only catch is, the offer is for today only. Happy Valentine’s Day love!
You are so cute same as my cat. Have a beautiful valentine day.
Special moments like these make me feel like I could hire a stalker just to take pictures of us. That’s how weird you make me feel. Hapy Valentines!

Funny Valentine Day Cards

Where have we come to? Underneath the procession of stars and the dazzling of the night. No baby, be positive. Electricity has gone and you’ve to enjoy dinner under the open sky. Happy Valentine day.
I am celebrating Independence Day as I am still single. Happy Valentine day, my dear friends.
Some days I feel like I could just kill you, but then who would I have to hold me the way you do? Always and forever the love of my life. Happy Valentine’s Day!
They say love is a stupid feeling, then I guess I am a fool, a fool in love with the most beautiful woman in my eyes! Happy Valentine’s Day!
Don’t be so cool when you are with me, you look so fool. Happy valentine day.
Chocolates aren’t enough to fill your huge appetite, so I’ll buy you dinner instead; I hope you say yes to going out with me on valentine.
Why does loving you have to be this toxic beautiful? I pray each day you look my way, and today, I’ll stand right in front of you so you don’t miss me my valentine.
Although I am afraid of height, I would climb the tallest mountain just to shout out my love for you, but then cry afterwards. Love you my valentine!
Enjoy the love making day throughout the day an throughout the night. Happy Valentine day.
You are my candy crush that I love to play daily. Happy valentine day.
You are my wife, my commander in chief and sometimes my mother. You scare me but in the best way I could be scared. Happy Valentine’s Day my beautiful wife!
I know you’ll give that chocolate stained smile today, but I won’t have any chocolates for you love, I will only have a heart that’ll be true to you always. I love you my valentine.
May forever be the start of you and me holding hands today dear crush, for even though I’ll sweat a lot, I’d rather sweat on you. Happy Valentine’s Day!
You are not only the bee that sucks my pollen; you are the flower that I lay my pollen in. Happy Valentine’s Day my love!
I wouldn’t have tasted anything of a quarrel if it wasn’t you. I cannot imagine life without you. Happy Valentine’s Day! Quarrelsome sweetheart!
Sending you a big Valentine hug! My sweet teddy bear, you always give me the warmth and comfort I need at night. My sweet pillow, Happy Valentine’s Day!
You are the biggest, most humongous person I know and that I only speak of your heart. Happy valentine’s dear, you’ll always be mine.
I love you so much. But what’s your name?? LOL. Happy valentine day, baby.
Happy days can’t really exist without the funny way you laugh at serious situations. You are my star and I love you. Happy valentines!
Your little arms make me feel like the strongest man in the world, that is why I will always protect you my valentine. I love you darling!
Hey, my sweety, just reduce your belly. Happy valentine day.
Thanks to some guy, we have this day to enjoy and make fun of each other, can’t wait to nibble on your ears and tell you how much I love you. Happy valentines!
I can never measure up to the postman, who will bring you love letters from your crushes, but I don’t have to because I am the postman, and I will bring you the love letters this valentine.
As an engineer, I would love to build you a staircase to my heart, it’s long and tedious, I hope you won’t give up on the long climb this valentine. I love you.
Our love is like a car with no brakes, it’s simply unstoppable. I will love you till the gas gives out. Have a fantastic valentine my love, you are loved!
You completely finish me with your endless demands and nags, like get the milk and groceries, I am just your husband and have met the most important demand of all; being your valentine forever.
Valentine’s Day enjoyment lasts for only 24 hours, but the consequences of your actions can lead to a bouncing bundle of joy after nine months.
You complete me, and that is not what most can do, I hope you enjoy the time as I will be watching you from a far for you don’t know me but I know you well. Happy valentine my crush.
Valentine is a day for a child with an arrow to go around shooting people, this is my apology for not taking you out, I don’t want to be a victim too. Have a hearty valentine regardless.
If you happen to fall, I’ll be there to laugh at you first and then help you up afterwards, but then again, I can’t help but keep falling in love with you. Hearty valentine!
All I need is love, but a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt, especially today, on Valentine’s Day! Just giving you a hint of what I’d like. Love you!
Be my valentine and I promise you a chocolate fountain, an imaginary one anyway, I hope you enjoy this time and I apologize for my being broke. Have an awesome time.
One funny thing about Valentine’s Day is that after the enjoyment comes the possibility of a crying baby in the cradle. Enjoy wisely.