St. Patrick’s Day Jokes to Share on March 17
Well, we hope you have something green you’re ready to show off this St. Patty’s Day. To make sure you’re ultra prepared for the holiday, we wanted to give you a bunch of jokes to tell your friends and family while you march along your parade or indulge in another Shamrock Shake.
St. Patrick’s Day Jokes
1. Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick’s Day?
Because real rocks are too heavy.
2. What happens if you cross poison ivy with a four-leaf clover?
You get a rash of good luck!
3. What kind of bow can’t be tied?
A rainbow.
4. Where can you always find gold on St. Patty’s Day?
In the dictionary.
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5. Who was St. Patrick’s favorite superhero?
Green Lantern.
6. Why should you never iron a four-leaf clover?
You don’t want to press your luck.
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7. How did the Irish Jig get started?
Too much water to drink and not enough restrooms.
8. What do they call the Irish Jig at McDonald’s?
A Shamrock Shake
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9. What would you get if you crossed Christmas with St. Patrick’s Day?
St. O’Claus!
10. What’s long and green and has a low IQ?
A St. Patrick’s Day parade.
Irish jokes
17. Irish puns are the most O’ffensive.
18. When is an Irish potato not an Irish potato?
When it’s a French fry.
19. Why is Ireland the fastest growing country in Europe?
Because it’s always Dublin.
20. “I married an Irishman on St. Patrick’s Day.”
“Oh, really?”
“No, O’Reilly!”
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21. Are people jealous of the Irish?
Sure, they’re green with envy.
22. What’s the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?
One less drunk at the party.
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23. How does every Irish joke start?
By looking over your shoulder.
24. Why wasn’t Jesus born in Ireland?
He couldn’t find three wise men or a virgin.
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25. What’s Irish and stays out all night?
Paddy O’furniture.
26. Why are the Irish so concerned about global warming?
They’re really into green living.
27. Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Irish!
Irish who?
Irish you a happy St. Patrick’s Day!
Have fun today and drink responsibly!
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